Tuesday, June 28, 2005

Arse, love?

So I fucked this dude last night and him having issues with two fingers I'm all like. "Sigh! Het bois and their arses! Just can't take it like us gays." Hes all about the 'I'm not gay!"
you know.... the usual. You have to admit... and he did eventually.... that we all like it up the butt. About 90% of my encounters have been with people of varing genders and orientations have been into the butt love. The rest of you just need a hot bath or some poppers!
So I'm reading this thread: http://www.bluelight.nu/vb/showthread.php?s=&threadid=206901&perpage=25&highlight=mushroom&pagenumber=2
look at the amazing things your butt can do! Isn't it great. You can shit, fuck and take a roll!
I think we should celebrate our amazing arses. The true democratic body part. I think Foucault was into his anal fisting and I have to say. Viva la revolution!
So lets all have a bath and shove xtc up our arses. It will be great. I think everyone reading this needs to post and tell me just HOW MUCH you like to take it (being unspecified objects of chemicals) up your arse! Do it.... do it now....

Friday, June 17, 2005

The Tyranny of QUEER

I've noticed little disclaimers comming out of Wellington. Saying things like:

*Queer is a reclaimed word inclusive of all members of lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgendered, intersex, fa’afafine, takatapui, and other sexual minority and non-heterosexual communities. We acknowledge that it is a word with which not all people will wish to be identified.

Which is something I found on the bottom of a form I was to fill in. Just to remind me- too bad if I don't like it, they are going to do it anyway.
If not 'queer' then what?
I guess I could crawl back to my normative hetrosexuality. One of those women who has always existed. Who for no apparent reason could never be happy as some man's wife. There is no community of people like me.
But I am not a minority.
I look like nothing unusual. I'm not unusual. I just chose to talk about it.

I guess good for those people who do have a community. Why should they represent people who they are not and don't understand. There is so much of tokenistic efforts to represent people who, for a lot of the time, aren't even there or we don't even know. I'd like to think we can be open for anyone. There more I do groups and stuff the more I realise that people really need to make their own revelution. I'm doing it but I'm not dragging anyone up with me. Things have changed so much. It's amazing.

I think it's odd that we might be having a backlash to a movement that never even got off the ground. We wanted queer to be... loving who you want, being able to have no gender or any number of genders and changin either daily if you choose. Bisexuality and bigenderism would no longer exist and we could all be free and po-mo. Piss in any toilet, make out with faghags, wear any clothes, be pround for people thinking you are in drag. You would think I got chased down the street for it.
But now I guess it's over. What a shallow victory. This was worse than feminism!

Wednesday, June 08, 2005

Hair

Pictures of Hair. I saw this movie the other day. And the Morgan brought it. I guess he likes it. Maybe if youall beg he'll write something.

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Homosexuals are Everywhere!!!!!!!!!!!

Well as a bona fide fah hag I have to say I am not in anyway adverse to the odd homosexual male. Pointing out that this is in a totaly platonic way as I have to interest in breaking that oh-so-special bond between desperate, fat, femme girls and campy hair dressers. And even so you have to say that any man who would sleep with me proberlly isn't homosexual. Or else they are very drunk, confused, promise to never do it again or don't yet know their true inner nature of homosexuality. I mean I have to say I don't really see the appeal in men. I mean they smell funny, they don't like to do the dishes, they don't dress nice, they center their lives around their dick (and I will spare you from the gory detail of how this can go wrong!- lets just say I'm going for the pick-your-own-size handy dildo http://www.dvice.co.nz/
always hard, pick your colour.
I mean okay your dick is alright but how many men out there glow in the dark and are dishwasher safe!!!!
So the point.... we are getting there slowley, (just the way I like it)
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ahhhhh how erotic... and you can just eat it when you get bored of it. My two favirote things in one... food and sex.

So I'm on this date with a guy who I found on the internet and thought he was cute. Morgan warned me... he said I know who he is and he is definately a homosexual. But me and my bi crusade thought nothing of it. Then I met him... the classical arcitecture rant, the health food, the $500 underwear, the ex (boy friend), the appitite for manly hugs, the lisp!
I have finally seen in the wild that bizzare and reclusive creature the male homosexual. Long lost in the jungle I have lured one into my fave cafe. What wonder!
And to think I thought I was going to get sex from that :(
oh well... once a fag hag always a fag hag I guess.

Tuesday, June 07, 2005

If I had a million dollars....

Okay this is the most selfindugant post ever. But seeing WINZ has been fucking me round so much I can barely afoard to eat I thought I'd imagine what I'd do if I won lottery or something and suddently had a million dollars.

I'd buy a top-of-the-line laptop so I don't have to use the arse ones at uni or use my ex boyfriends (which means he comes round whenever he feels like it to fiddle with. Which is a mixed blessing... but still.

Pay some monkey to clean my room. I am so uber lazy.

Go on a shopping spree and take some friends with me and buy them clothes.

Get a Futon bed.

Pay off my loan. I know that I don't really have to but I still don't want to be in debt if I can help it.

Pay off my overdraft.

Go to the dentist and get my teeth fixed up.

Get some therapy.

Then after all that crap I'm going to have an adventure. I will finish my degree and go just after christmas. With lots of new clothes and really really naff matching Louis Vuitton suitcases. I'd take Morgan and maybe one other person (but I haven't decided yet- I would say my brother but I don't think he's appreciate being dragged halfway across the world by his crazy sister!)
So we'd fly first class (oviously)and generally be bitches all the way to sweden. Where I deserve a fucking health spa :P
Then London where I will have like 4 months of partying all the time. Then maybe Amstadam and spain I dunno.
I would spend all the rest of the money. And then have a normal life. Because being rich sucks and I'd go back on the fucking dole!

Wednesday, May 04, 2005

Friends

Having some not too extrodinary things happen- as in being given a charm by my girl friend at the time in order to attract 'decent' friends and being dumped for not having the heart to deny being much more attached to my friends than to her.
I just saw this girl- we used to be like sisters- She smiled and waved and I walked past and did the fingers. Even Morgan was shocked at my bitchiness. It's so fucked. There is this other chick I thought I would be like best friends with and so the other night when I was fucked off my nut I told her how sad I was and she is not into that and isn't talking to me. Oh well. Fuck we ditch people for the shallowest reasons. Sometimes I wish I had the kind of friends who would always be there for me but I can't say that when I am down there is no one there. The oddest people open up to me when I need it and others who bolt when I need some downtime. I wouldn't say that there is something wrong with fair-wheather friends as long as you have stormy wheather friends as well.

Wednesday, April 20, 2005

Bisexuality and the 'Does Not Identify' Generation

I was just reading the Philup Patston column is Express and it got me thinking. Is labeling as Bisexual so 80s?
I'm still doing it in a kinda- here I am and I'm not a Lesbian and I'm not a straight but I'm not really sure where to take it from there- way. People get confused sometimes that I have boyfriends and girlfriends and people say that beging bi isn't about being equally attracted to boys and girls. I have some issues with this like:
*what's a boy and what's a girl. Would I be atracted to someone who was both or neither or does my atraction have anything to do with gender anyway?

*If a heterosexual is sometimes atracted to someone of the same sex and a gay person is sometimes atracted to someone of the oppostite gender then why do I have to take the shifty label if in fact mine is more seemless?

*What if it's something totally different from sexual morphology. Like gender and if gender is socially contructed then isn't it likely that is is a continuum and therefore birth sex and socialised gender are not the same. What are we attracted to anyway. Genitals or appearance?
So like a gay male friend of mine might go to a dyke dance and say 'look there's a hot boy' and on closer look the 'boy' turns out to be a girl is my friend no longer atracted because they now 'know' that the 'girl' has a minge instead of a cock? Or is gayness a social costruct in itself?

But my point anyway. People keep telling me queer, queer, queer. I am not going to identify. But do you have a fallback over what to identify with. What does queer really mean ayway? Isn't is much of an abitary box as gay-bi-straight... What's non-queer? Is that straight? And so it's like heterosexuality is this this which we are still classing as natural or naturalised by defining ourselves by that which we are not. If we are queer (read strange) then everytime we say queer we are re-inforcing the normaility of heterosexuality. We are cutting oerselves off from the opposite-sex attraction and contact which most bisexuals and many 'queers' will expirience.

I guess the people are right who say that bisexuals like me who are strongly into the queer\gay\lesbian community are really failed lebians or gays are right.
And the people who say we are deviant and oversexed heterosexuals are right as well. We lack the will or control to limit ourselves to our preferance to devine ourselves by one community. But at the same time we still stick to this label in order to explain who we are which is so misused and inacurate and outdated.
I keep meeting people who will not identify their sexuality at all. A friend of mine who I just met and was told by someone else that he was straight when I talked to him found he had had expirience from all over the gender spectrum and thought he has a beautiful girlfriend (who makes me so jelous!) he does not self-identify as straight. It's an assumption I come up with from the gay community time and time again- if you don't fit any 'queer' identity you must be straight. That's what happened when I came out when I was living with a long term live-in boyfriend and didn't know what I was. that is another story- but just to say. I'd rather ID as bi- problematic as it is- than to be assumed as something I'm not.

Friday, April 01, 2005

UniQ I love you

Man my club is great. If you wanna join my club you can go http://groups.yahoo.com/group/UniQ_Auckland.
It has had a bit of internal angst but overall it is a nice group. So join. Come on. I know you want to.